Beaumont: So... you go off on a trip and forget all about me? Me: I haven't forgotten about you. I've just been visiting and having fun. Beau: And drinking a whole lot of wine from the looks of it. Me: Not that much. Beau: Sure. So you say. I saw the photos. Me: Are you judging me? Beau: Who me? Judge? Nah.... Continue Reading →
Me: Beau. You know you're not a lapdog, right? Beau: Says who? Me: Says me. You're too big to be a lapdog. Beau: You must be mistaken. I seem to fit just fine on this chair. Me: You're sitting on me. Beau: What's your point? Me: You're heavy. Beau: Then maybe you should have moved before I climbed up into the chair.... Continue Reading →
Beaumont: Um.... just because you spent the day yesterday as a wild dandelion woman doesn't mean I have to become a dandelion pooch today! Me: C'mon Beau! Where's your sense of adventure? Beau: I left it on the couch when you made me get up and come for a walk at this undawgly hour this morning. Me: It's not... Continue Reading →
Me: Beaumont. Leave the cat alone. Beau: Maybe if she wasn't here I wouldn't be so pestered by her and you wouldn't have to be reminding me to leave her alone. Me: She's only here for the weekend. Beau: I thought I told you I didn't want her to come back after the last time. Me: I thought... Continue Reading →
Me: Beaumont! Is that a moose leg bone in the bed? Beau: What about it? Me: I go take a shower and you bring that thing onto the bed? Ugh. Disgusting. Beau: My dad said it was ok. Me: I repeat. Ugh. Disgusting. Please remove it. Beau: Nah. I like it. But, (smiling slyly) if it bothers you that much... Continue Reading →
Me: Beaumont Beau: (innocently) W'az up? Me: Don't you w'za up me. You know. Beau: Know what? Me: There's a ball on the bed. Beau: A ball? Hmmm.... I don't see a ball. Me: I do. Beau: Then close your eyes. Go back to sleep. You won’t see it anymore. Me: I can’t. I’ll still... Continue Reading →
Me: Beaumont? Beau: Whaaaat? Me: Why are you hiding in the kitchen? Beau: I'm not. Me: Then what are you doing? Beau: Waiting. Me: For what? Beau: Not 'for what'. For who. Me: (Sigh) Whom. Beau: What? Me: The proper way to say it is, For whom. Beau: Who. Whom. Doesn't matter. What matters is my buddy, Rod, said he might... Continue Reading →
Beaumont: Excuse me? You've come back to bed. What's with this? Me: Well. We had a late night. I got up early to clean up the kitchen from our dinner party and now I need a nap. Beaumont: And I'm just supposed to lie here and take it? Me: I'd prefer it if you didn't lie right on top... Continue Reading →
Beau: Can I just say something? Me: You're sitting on my chest. Do I have a choice? Beaumont: No. Anyway. It is 8am already and you are still not up. What's a dog to do to get your attention? Me: Well sitting on me works. Beaumont: Good I need to go out. Me: Ask your... Continue Reading →
