Shhh! Do Not Disturb.

Me:  Beaumont. Do you have to lay in the middle of the floor? Beaumont:  I'm not just laying here. I'm sleeping. Me:  Okay. Do you have to sleep in the middle of the floor? Beau:  Yes. Me:  How about 'no'? Beau:  No. Me:  Ummm... No you don't have to sleep in the middle of the floor or no, you're... Continue Reading →

A Dawg’s Real Life

Beaumont:  Remind me again why I have to get up? Me:  Because it's morning and I want to get up. Beaumont:  Then get up already. Me:  You're lying on top of me. Beaumont:  You can slide out.  Just don't disturb me. Me:  Beaumont. Don't be difficult. Beaumont:  Jane never made me get up. Me:  Well... Jane... Continue Reading →

On the short end of Beau’s schtick

  Beaumont:  So... you think it's okay to just leave me like this? Me:  Al and Jane are there. Beau:  That's not my point. Me:  Oh dear.  Here we go... Beau:  You go away and leave me and now I'm getting attitude? Me:  Oops. Sorry. My apologies. It's just you always do that 'that's not my point'... Continue Reading →

The Execu Pup

Beaumont:   Where's my coffee? Me:  Excuse me? Beaumont:  My coffee. I'm the ExecuPup. You're my secretary. Why aren't you getting me coffee? Me:  Who said I'm your secretary? Beaumont:  I'm the ExecuPup. I make the decisions. I decided. Me:  You seem to forget I'm the boss here. Beaumont:  You seem to forget I'm the one... Continue Reading →

Do I Have to Move?

Me:  Beaumont... Beau:  Whaaat? Me:  You're lying on my side of the bed. Beau:  Well actually I was sleeping. Me:  How could you be sleeping already? I just got up to get a glass of water Beau:  I have a clear conscience. Makes it easy to go to sleep. Me:  Are you suggesting I don't?... Continue Reading →

It’s not my best look

Beaumont: Excuse me. You're not posting that photo of me on FB are you? Me: Why wouldn't I? Beaumont: It's not my best look. Me: What's wrong with it? Beaumont: I look like I've been on a weekend long bender. Me: I think it's cute. Anyway. You don't drink. Beaumont: You could drive me to... Continue Reading →

Dogyrights

Beaumont: So... what's with the blog you've started about me? Me: Well, it's not really about you. It's about our conversations. I'm sharing them. Beaumont: I see. And when were you going to tell me about this? Me: I am. Right now. Beaumont (sarcastically): How thoughtful. Have you spoken with my lawyers? Me: Pardon me?... Continue Reading →

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