Me: Beaumont. Would you please get that disgusting thing off the couch. Beau: It's not a 'thing'. It's my Bebé. Me: I don't care what it is. It's disgusting. Please take it away. Now. Beau: If you throw it, I will. Me: I am not touching that thing! Beau: Bebé. Me: Beau.... Beau: (oh so... Continue Reading →
Beaumont: Louise! Louise!.... you dead? Me: No Beau. I'm in Savasana pose. Beau: You look it. Me: What's that supposed to mean? Beau: It ain't called 'the corpse pose' for nothing Louise Me: Oh wow. You know that? Beau: You know Yoga was invented by dogs. Right? Me: Ummm.... really? Beau: Yup. Yog. Dog. We... Continue Reading →
Me: Beaumont. We need to talk. Beau: I'm busy. Me: Beau.... Beau: Yah. Yah. Yah. Whatever. Me: Beaumont. This is serious. Beau: Taking me to the groomers and inflicting all that brushing and fluffing on me is serious Louise. If what you wanna talk about is what I think you wanna talk about, well that's... Continue Reading →
Me: Beaumont. What are you doing? Beau: Sitting. Me: On my lap. Beau: My... you are observant Louise. Me: It's kind of hard not to be. You're too big and heavy to be a lapdog. Beau: I ain't heavy. I'm your brother. Me: Right. And it's a long, long road with many a winding turn.... Continue Reading →
Me: Beaumont. What are you looking at? Beau: Not looking at. Watching for. Me: Oh. There's a difference? Beau: Oh you wordsmith you, Louise. Of course there's a difference. Me: Ok. I'll bite. What's the difference. Beau: Well... using the phrase "I'll bite" with a dawg is an example of you looking for trouble. Me:... Continue Reading →
Beaumont: Louise, we need to talk. Me: Uh huh. About what? Beau: Like you don't know. Me: Ummm. Beau. No I don't. Beau: Yes you do. Me: (sighing) Honestly Beau. I don't. I can't read your mind. Beau: Really? And all this time I thought that's how you wrote these conversations. By reading my mind.... Continue Reading →
I awaken (before dawn) to Beaumont sitting by my side of the bed, staring at me. And I mean staring! Beaumont: Grrrrrr..... Me: Use your words Beau. Beau: I'm a dawg. I don't have words. I have sounds. Me: Do we have to argue about this right now? I'm sleeping. Beau: You gotta wake-up. Me:... Continue Reading →
Me: Beaumont. Why are you scowling? Beau: So you notice? Well that's a start. Me: Of course I notice. I notice everything about you. Beau: Right. So didn't you notice I wasn't keen on going to the hairdressers? Me: Oh. Well. It was for your own good. Beau: Have you ever noticed how people use... Continue Reading →
Me: Beau. If you get off me I'll get up and we can go out for your walkie. Beaumont: It's Sunday Louise. Can't we sleep in just a bit? Please? Me: You gotta go, Beau. Beau: Where? Me: Very funny. Outside. To do your business. Beau: What business? Me: Don't be indelicate. Beau: I'm not.... Continue Reading →
Beaumont: So... what do you think? Me: About what Beau? Beau: My photo. Silly. Me: It's lovely. I did take it you know. Beau: Yeah. I know. But I'm wondering whether you got my good profile or if the other side is better. Me: Ummm.. Does it matter.? You're handsome either side. Beau: Well of... Continue Reading →
Sundays with Beaumont 