Beau’s Salty Logic

Me: Beau. Please don’t drink seawater.

Beau: Why not?

Me: Because it’s not good for you.

Beau: How do you know?

Me: I just do.

Beau: And I just want to.

Me: Why?

Beau: Duh. Because I’m thirsty.

Me: I appreciate that but it’s not good for you.

Beau: How do you know.

Me: I just do.

Beau: That’s not an answer.

Me: Well… it’s the only one I’ve got.

Beau: Well… until you can provide evidence that your statement is in fact backed up by evidence, I shall keep doing what I’m doing.

Me: It will make you sick.

Beau: I’ve been drinking it for awhile now. Has it made me sick?

Me: That’s beside the point. It will, eventually.

Beau: Hmmm…. that’s like saying death will get you, eventually. Louise. Louise Louise. The unassailable fact of life is, it always ends with death. There is no such verified, definitive and non-debatable truth about your statement, “Drinking sea water will make you sick,” so… why should I believe you?

Me: Because I said so?

Beau: And I ask again. Why should I believe you?

Me: You know if you throw up I’m the one who’s going to have to clean up your mess? Right?

Beau: Whether I drink sea water or not, that is always the case, Louise. (smiling sweetly and taking a bow) And on that bow, I shall quietly exit stage left. My work here is done.

Me: Not so fast buddy. What work?

Beau: Oh Louise. You of feeble, befuddled and bewildering human mind. My work is to burst your human-made egotistical bubble and prove you wrong. Always has been. Always will be.

Me: Says who?

Beau: Says me who always wins and is now exiting stage left.

And so, he leaves the stage leaving me behind to wonder… What just happened? AAARGHHH!