Dogyrights

Beaumont: So… what’s with the blog you’ve started about me?

Me: Well, it’s not really about you. It’s about our conversations. I’m sharing them.

Beaumont: I see. And when were you going to tell me about this?

Me: I am. Right now.

Beaumont (sarcastically): How thoughtful. Have you spoken with my lawyers?

Me: Pardon me? Your lawyers?

Beaumont: Yes. If you plan on capitalizing on my brilliance by using my words in a commercial endeavour, then I need to ensure my rights are protected.

Me: Umm… What rights would those be?

Beaumont: Dogyrights.

Me: They’re called ‘copyrights’.

Beaumont:  Well I’ll be dawggone. You admit I have them.

Me:  Of course you have them. But you forget one thing. Remember. You can’t read and write and I’m doing the typing.

Beaumont:  But I can speak. Give me the phone. I’m calling my lawyer.

Me:  Wait! What if I promise to give you an extra treat a day and let you play with that cute poodle down the street?

Beaumont:  An extra ten of my favourite treats a day, and I get to bring that cute poodle home to show her my dog bed.

Me:  Ten treats a day? You’ll get fat.

Beaumont:  Not if you throw in an extra walk a day.

Me:  I don’t see why you have to get all huffy about this. I’m just writing a blog.

Beaumont:  Using my words.

Me:  My words too.

Beaumont:  Now look who’s being all huffy. At least you own your words.

Me:  Well… I kinda own…

Beaumont:  I wouldn’t go there… Remember, ‘to blog or not to blog’? What’s it going to be?

Me:  Right. Back to that copyright issue.

Beaumont: Dogyrights. So what’s it gonna be? Are you gonna dogy-up or am I throwing you to the dawgs?

Me:  Fine. Deal.

Beaumont:  What about the poodle?

Me:  I’ll check with her owners.

Beaumont:  Better do it quick. After 24 hours, this deal goes to the dawgs.