Beau: So…. let me get this straight. You had to play with a bunch of ladies in your studio yesterday and didn’t have time to post my blog?
Me: Uh. Huh.
Beau: And that’s acceptable to you?
Me: It is what it is.
Beau: That’s all you’ve got to say?
Me: What do you want me to say Beau?
Beau: How about, I’m sorry. It will never happen again.
Me: But that wouldn’t be the truth. I can’t promise it won’t happen again.
Beau: And you have the audacity to call me an diot?
Me: Look. That was a slip of the tongue.
Beau: You’re tongue’s too sharp. It hurts.
Me: Seriously. It wasn’t meant to hurt. I was just being funny.
Beau: I’m funny. You’re… well, let’s just leave at you’re not funny.
Me: Well, the guy laughed when I said it.
Beau: Louise. Louise. Louise. He asked you a simple question. He wanted to know my pedigree.
Me: I eventually told him.
Beau: After you said, ‘He’s part idiot.’
Me: Well, you were leaping up into a tree trying to catch a squirrel.
Beau: That’s what real dawg’s do.
Me: Hmmm… it didn’t seem too smart to me. The squirrel was waaay up there.
Beau: And I was jumping waaay high.
Me: Not high enough.
Beau: Didn’t warrant you calling me part idiot.
Me: You’re right. You’re right. I apologize.
Beau: Good. Now what are you going to do to make amends?
Me: What would you like me to do?
Beau: Promise never to miss a day posting my blog.
Me: I can’t promise you that.
Beau: Then I guess you’ll just have to live with the fact you hurt my feelings and can’t make it up to me.
Me: Beau. You’re a dog. You’ll forget about it by tomorrow.
Beau: I still haven’t forgotten you left me for a month last summer. And, you didn’t even get me a special treat for my birthday. And, you took off again for 10 days in October. And… well, there’s lots I haven’t forgotten.
Me: And obviously haven’t forgiven me for either.
Beau: Hey! You’re the one who isn’t willing to commit to making amends and if you recall, that’s an essential part of the apology process. See, I’m just trying to help you be a better human by keeping you honest.
Me: Fine. I commit to never being late on posting your blog again. Now will you forgive me?
Beau: Do you promise never to call me an idiot again?
Me: I said you were ‘part’ idiot. Not full blown right down to the ends of your furry little paws idiot.
Beau: You still think you’re funny don’t you?
Beau: So… who’s really the idiot? At least everyone agrees, I am funny. You?… Well. Nuff said.
Me: Have I ever told you my snail joke?
Beau: Unfortunately, yes.
Me: Well that’s funny!
Beau: No. It’s not. It’s the kind of a joke only an idiot would tell.
Beau: Hey. It is what it is.
And so, life with Beau continues on in all its lovely paradox.
And truth be told. I really shouldn’t have called him part idiot. He’s a Sheepadoodle!