Beaumont: Hello? Earth to Louise. Can’t you see the ball?
Me: Of course I can.
Me: And what?
Beau: Don’t be obtuse, Louise. You know the what.
Me: You want me to throw the ball.
Beau: See. You are present in this moment!
Me: Of course I am. I’m just not going to throw the ball in this moment.
Beau: Why not?
Me: See the ice? See the river?
Beau: I’m not blind Louise.
Me: Ahh… but can you do the math and put it all together into the reason why I’m not throwing the ball?
Beau: Math? Only math that doesn’t add up for me is how the trajectory of the ball when you throw it is nowhere near as far, nor as accurate, as when my dad throws it.
Me: Haha. I throw from a lower vantage point.
Beau: Your vertical challenges should not impact how far the ball goes. It’s physics Louise.
Me: Whatever. Physics. Schmysics. I’m still not throwing the ball.
Beau: You know when you use ‘Whatever’ it’s all just a coverup to hide your fear.
Me: Ok. Dr. Freud. Tell me. What am I afraid of?
Beau: Louise. Louise. We don’t have all day. But, I’ll play for a moment. You’re afraid if you throw the ball it will land in the river and I’ll have to swim for it and you’ll be all embarrassed by how bad your throwing really is.
Me: Not even close.
Beau: Okay. Then you tell me, why are you not throwing the ball?
Me: Ice. Cold. River.
Beau: Hey! If you’re not going to throw it into the river, who cares how cold the river is?
Me: I care.
Beau: Well thank you for caring enough to share. Now. Share the ball. Make it move. Give me a really good reason to run after it.
Me: I’m not throwing it in the river Beau.
Beau: Fortunately, the way you aim that chucker, it will probably end up in the river anyway.
Me: That’s not fair.
Beau: Hey! Who told you life is fair. Do you think I wanted a hooman with such poor ball throwing skills?
Me: (picking the ball up in the chucker and aiming it behind me, back towards the trail) Fine. Here goes.
Beau: Watch me swim!
Sigh. Unfortunately, he was right. The ball flew, not where I aimed it but back towards the water. Good thing I was standing far enough from the edge, it didn’t go out into the water but landed just at the edge of the rocks.
Sigh. It really is unfair how Beau is always right!