The “Get Out Of Control Guru”

Beaumont: So…. I suppose I should wish you Happy Mother’s Day.

Me: That’s lovely Beau. Thank you.

Beau: You know, you’re really the only mother I’ve ever known Louise. I don’t remember my birth mother. She gave me up so young.

Me: She had no choice Beau.

Beau: But aren’t you the one who says we always have a choice.

Me: Yes. But the choice isn’t necessarily about what’s happening in your life, it’s about what you do with what’s happening. And for your birth mom. she had zero choice about giving you up. She could only choose how she adapted to that reality.

Beau: Do you think she’s ok?

Me: I’m pretty sure she is Beau. Remember how we met one of your younger sisters at the park awhile ago? She’d only been apart from your mom for a few months and her hooman mom said Maya, your birth mom, was doing really well.

Beau: Oh right. I remember. But what about me? What if I’d wanted to choose to stay with my birth mom?

Me: Well… we hoomans don’t give you dawgs much choice in those matters Beau. We kind of dictate what’s going on.

Beau: Hmmm… well… does that seem right to you?

Me: Oh my. That’s a pretty tricky question Beau. See, we hoomans need you, probably more than you need us so, to ensure our needs are met, we make sure we have control.

Beau: Hoomans are weird Louise. Why can’t you just share it?

Me: Control? Well… then it wouldn’t be control would it? And believe me, hoomans do like their control.

Beau: (smiling innocently) Sort of like how you don’t want me to go in the river and think you can keep me out?

Me: (laughing – sort of) Yeah. Like that.

Beau: (more innocent, head caulked sideways smiling) Is control good for you Louise?

Me: Hmmm… Well, I can tell you this much. Being in control may not always be the best thing but not having it sure can make me feel very unhappy!

Beau: Then consider me your “Get Out Of Control Guru”.

Me: What’s that supposed to mean?

Beau: Well… Being in control isn’t good for you…

Me: I said it’s not always the best thing….

Beau: Semantics. The fact is, being in control is not good for you so, I have made it my mission in life to help you break your control freak habits.

Me: Seriously? You think that’s your role?

Beau: Isn’t that the role of every child Louise? To help their mother loosen her habit of being controlling?

Me: Oh. You might have a point.

Beau: Of course I do. Anyway, next time you tell me not to go in the river and I choose to ignore you and go in anyway and drop my ball so you have to come in after me, think of it as a gift.

Me: A gift?

Beau: Yeah. A gift that is helping you stretch your ‘letting go of control’ muscles.

Me: Oh my. Such an…. ummm… interesting perspective of your disobedience Beau.

Beau: It’s not disobedience Louise. It’s me, practicing the second role of the child – Give your parents lots of opportunity to find the value in all things. And the value in your having to get in the river with me is you get to have fun too!

Me: Stepping in ice cold water is supposed to be fun?

Beau: If you change your glasses, or at least your attitude you will see it is Louise.

Me: Am I supposed to say thank you?

Beau: Not today Louise. It’s Mother’s Day. You get the day off.

Me: Does that mean I can go back to bed?

Beau: Only if you can beat me to it. And you know that’s not happening. I’ve got four paws to your two feet.

Me: But aren’t you supposed to be extra-nice to me on Mother’s Day?

Beau: I am. I’m letting you have control of the keyboard to type this.

Me: But you let me do that every Sunday Beau.

Beau: I know. Aren’t I wonderful! You get to feel like every Sunday is Mother’s Day!

Me: (sighing) Of course. Silly me for not seeing that.

Beau: Hey! I’m the gift that just keeps on giving!

Me: You’re out of control Beau. You know that, right?

Beau: Nah. I’m just a gifted “Get Out Of Control Guru”. Remember?

Me: How could I forget?

Beau: It’s best you don’t. So… you finish up here and I’ll see you later. I’m going back to bed. Oh. And don’t forget to sign off with my wishing all the mother’s out there, no matter how the gift of being a mother to a child unfolded in their life, Happy Mother’s Day!

Me: Yes Beau.

Beau: Good girl. Now that’s obedience.

Me: You’re pushing it.

Beau: Role No. 3 of the child. Push your mother’s buttons whenever possible…. Oh. and don’t forget to wish my birthmom Maya a Happy Mother’s Day too. Without here, you wouldn’t have the gift of me in your life!

And so it goes… Beau always finds the ‘truth’ in everything. And he definitely knows how to push my buttons!

Beau: Hey… Just doing my job, Louise. Just doin’ my job!

Sigh…. And so it goes. Beau goes back to bed and he and C.C. leave no room for me …

Regardless… Beau is right. No matter how you came to call yourself a mother, Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers out there! And Maya… Thank you for the gift of Beau in our lives. You would be proud of your son. He’s the best.

Beau: You mean Best Top Dawg. Right?

Me: I thought you went back to bed.

Beau: I did. But… seeing as it’s Mother’s Day, I thought I’d move over and make a little room for you.

Me: How… kind.

Beau: Here’s where you get to make a choice Louise. Say thank you and come back to bed or… play martyr. Your choice. Your Mother’s Day.

Sigh (again). And so I do. Say thank you and squeeze into the tiny space he’s left me on the bed. It is Mother’s Day after all!