Beaumont: I can’t believe it.
Me: What’s that Beau?
Beau: You know what.
Me: With you… I’m never quite sure…
Beau: Already with the sarcasm? I’d think if you’re going off on a trip without me you could at least dispense with resorting to such a feeble form of communication.
Me: Oh. Sorry.
Beau: My oh my. So sincere Louise.
Me: Seriously Beau. Can you not give me just a little break?
Beau: Like you give me a trip to see the Littles, Thurlow and Ivy?
Me: Not happening Beau.
Beau: Then your request for a break… not happening either Louise.
Me: (sighing) I can’t take you with me Beau. I’m flying this time and there’s no way you’ll enjoy that experience.
Beau: And all the times your drove and didn’t take me?
Me: (sighing again) Well… it’s just easier without you.
Beau: Seriously? That’s your excuse?
Me: Ooops. Sorry. I meant to say, your dad would be too lonely if we’re both gone at the same time.
Beau: Ha! Like he doesn’t go play golf everyday?
Me: It’s going to be too hot this week for him to play golf everyday. He’ll be home with you.
Beau: While you’re off cavorting with ‘the Littles’.
Me: It’s Ivy’s first birthday, Beau.
Beau: And it would have been her first chance to meet me.
Me: I’m never going to win this one am I?
Beau: You should be used to not winning a conversation with me Louise. You’re track record is really bad.
Me: Yeah. I know. But what I can’t figure out is why, if I’m doing the typing, I come out on the short end every time.
Beau: Truth in literature, Louise. It’s an essential. Even when you’re writing it.
Me: Are you trying to say I don’t always write the truth Beau?
Beau: Nope. What I’m saying is, your version of truth is very subjective. But… when you’re writing my words and thoughts, there’s no grey area, only, The Truth As The Top Dawg Tells It. And that is what you must write.
Me: But why can’t I write the truth according to me?
Beau: Because your version of the truth just isn’t always as true Louise.
Me: Ummmm….. Oh….. You know you’ve lost me on this one Beau? Right?
Beau: It’s okay grasshopper. Every blade of grass is an invitation to hop higher.
Me: ummm… That’s not how the saying goes Beau.
Beau: Perhaps in your world Louise. But in a dawg’s world, as our noses are always in the grass, I think we know the truth about it and the creatures who inhabit it better than you hoomans.
Me: We should probably end this conversation right? I think I’m going to lose big time if we go on.
Beau: See grasshopper. You’re learning to jump to my command real good.
Me: Bad English Beau.
Beau: Bad idea to leave me again Louise.
Sigh…. And thus Beau once again wins the argument. And no, I will not be backing down and taking him to Vancouver with me.