Me: Beaumont. Quit staring at me. I’m trying to sleep.
Beau: I’m trying to get your attention.
Me: Go to sleep.
Beau: I need to go out.
Me: I took you out before we came to bed. Why do you have to go out now?
Beau: Why do you think?
Me: Because you want to chase that cute rabbit you saw half an hour ago.
Beau: Guess again.
Me: I don’t want to.
Beau: I bet you don’t want to clean up my mess either.
Beau: If you don’t take me out you will.
Me: Seriously? Why didn’t you think of this when I took you out before bedtime?
Beau: Probably because I didn’t have to go then.
Me: If I take you out and you do nothing you’re going to be in big doo doo.
Beau: If you do nothing and don’t take me out you’re going to be cleaning up my big doo doo. Your choice.
Me: You don’t leave me a lot of choice.
Beau: Hey. I’m just a dawg. Taking me out is your job. I just go with nature’s call.
Me: Why can’t nature call at a decent hour?
Beau: Nature doesn’t care about time.
Me: Don’t be cute.
Beau: Don’t be too slow. I gotta go.
Me: Alright already. I’m getting up.
Needless to say, Outside we did go so Beau could heed nature’s call.
Doggone it. If only he knew how to let himself out! Life would be so simple
Then again, life with Beaumont is never all that simple. Just ask him. he’ll tell you. It’s complicated.