Dear Santa!

Dear Santa,

It’s me. Beaumont.  You know, the Sheepadoodle who sometimes wears reindeer ears just to please Louise. Believe me Santa. I am not trying to impersonate Prancer or even Rudolph. Honest. It’s just … well, you know what she’s like! She’s been on your naughty list often enough you gotta know it’s her who makes me don those ears. It’s not my choice!

So… here’s the deal. I know I’m on your ‘nice list and all and I know I can count on you to bring me something extra special for the Ho! Ho! Hoiest day of the year but, seriously Santa, I’ve been sniffin’ every corner of the house and I have yet to uncover some special treat for me from her for Christmas!

Like, what’s up with that Santa?

Doesn’t she know I deserve a Christmas treat? Heck! I put up with her all year long. Can’t she do something nice for me on just this one day?

DawgGone it. Am I going to have to go out and buy myself something?  I know she’s already bought herself a gift. I found it. Though I don’t get why she bothers to wrap them in pretty paper and all that jazz. The paper tastes like sh… well, you know what I mean.

But anyway. Where was I?

Oh right. Christmas is only 3 days away and there does not seem to be anything special for me under the tree.

All I can say is, Santa. I sure hope you got my Uncle Jim on your ‘nice’ list. I can count on him to bring a bag of treats when he comes for Christmas dinner. You know, he even feeds me the whole bag at dinner. Like, I mean the WHOLE bag in one evening. He’s dawggone amazing! “She” of course gets upset. Says it’s not good for my tummy or some such dawgfoolery. What does she know? She won’t even let me eat those fabulous elk bones my buddy Rod sends me. (He deserves to be on your nice list too btw) But back to the elk bones. ever since Amelia, my doc, said they were hard on my teeth she’s refused to let my good buddy Rod send me any bones!

Dawggone it Santa. Doesn’t she know she’s gotta give the dog a bone? But Santa. Keep Amelia on your nice list ok? I really like her and I know her caution around the bones is because she really cares about me. And she does give me really good treats when I leave her office so yeah. Nice list for Amelia. Ok?

Definitely naughty list for Louise though. She just went away. Yup. AGAIN. For 3 days and didn’t even take me with her. I mean, Mt Engadine Lodge has pet-friendly rooms and all. And she DIDN’T take me.  Naughty. Naughty. Naughty.

Oh and Santa. Keep my Uncle Al on the ‘nice’ list too. Ok?  He’s a pretty cool dude and lets me stay at his place and chase rabbits and doesn’t even get mad at me!

And then there’s my dad, C.C.  He’s definitely on your nice list. OK?  He always ignores her rules when she’s away and lets me sleep on the bed. He’s a cool dude Santa.

So yeah. Nice list for everyone else. Naughty list for the naughty Louise.

And seriously, Santa. I’m gettin’ worried. No gift under the tree and can you believe it! I overheard her say to my sis, LeLe, that it was okay to bring that stinkin’ little feline over for a couple of weeks while they’re here when she goes away, AGAIN, after Christmas!

I mean, Santa buddy. I gotta draw the line somewhere and that line is on feline intruders who think they own the joint and won’t even let me jump up on the bed when she’s not in it because the silly feline thinks she is the Queen of Everything!

Dawg oh dawg Santa.  That feline and Louise, they’re naughty all the way through!

But I am a fellow of great heart and compassion so I’m gonna take pity on her and that cat and say, you know what Santa… Let’s forget about the past and let dawggones be bygones. For one night only, you can take them off your naughty list and get them something nice.

Yeah. I know. I’m mighty big-hearted. But hey Santa. That’s how I roll. Nice list all the way through.

So yeah. I know my letter got a little long Santa but I just wanted to say, to you and to all my readers, Merry Christmas and to all a good night!

NamastDawg, and all that jazz!

Sealed with licks and slobbers

 

6 thoughts on “Dear Santa!

Add yours

  1. Beaumont: What’s the matter with you? Why all the complaining? You have an INDOOR tree. What could be better? You are sounding more like cat. Shape Up or uncle Jim may cut back on the treats. (OK that’s not all that realistic is it.)
    Anyway it’s New Years Resolution time so we’re looking for some improvement in 2020.
    Al

    Like

    1. Dear Uncle Al. Some sympathy would be nice. I do have to live with Louise you know! 🙂 Ok. Ok. I hear ya. Indoor tree is good. I’ll see if she’ll let me use it as a pee post! 🙂 Haha — not a chance.

      New Years Resolution 2020 — be less demanding. Got it.

      and you’re right. No way will my Uncle jim cut back on my treats! No way man!

      Like

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