The No. 1 Rule

Me: So…. I suppose you think that’s pretty clever…

Beaumont: What’s that?

Me: The toy you’ve torn apart.

Beau: What toy?

Me: The one between your paws.

Beau: It wasn’t a toy Louise.

Me: It wasn’t?

Beau: No!!! It was a pesky marauding invader masquerading as a stuffed sheep. I killed it dead so it wouldn’t infest our home with its nefarious ways.

Me: Oh.

Beau: That’s it? No, Thank you? No, oh Beau you brave fierce protector warrior. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. For saving us and keeping us safe.

Me: Ummm…. Seriously Beau? It was a stuffed sheep and you tore it apart.

Beau: Well. If you must know. I did it for you.

Me: You did? Explain.

Beau: Remember how all your dinner guests were laughing and having a good time that night? Remember the joy in the air?

Me: Of course I do! So why would you tear apart a toy because people were laughing?

Beau: It wasn’t because they were laughing Louise. It was to KEEP them laughing.

Me: So you destroyed a perfectly good toy because people thought it was funny?

Beau: No. No. No. Louise. I did it because they were all laughing and having a great time trying to get the toy away from me and you were all like, “Beau be quiet. Beau don’t do that.” and you seemed to be forgetting about the No. 1 rule.

Me: No 1 rule? What’s that? Tear apart toys?

Beau: Louise. Sarcasm does not become you. And no. The No. 1 Rule is: Don’t take yourself so seriously.

Me: Oh. Right.

Beau: And you gotta admit Louise. You’ve been taking yourself way too seriously this past little while.

Me: Oh. Well… Um…. I’ve had a lot to worry about.

Beau: There’s lots in this world to worry about Louise. Doesn’t mean you have to let go of laughter and joy and plain old having fun.

Me: I have fun Beau.

Beau: Sure you do Louise.

Me: I mean I. Oh dear…. I have been taking myself kind of seriously lately haven’t I? But…

Beau: (interrupting) Keep your butt out of it Louise.

Me: But…

Beau: No butts. Have you or haven’t you been taking life pretty seriously lately?

Me: Well….

Beau: Well nothing. You know the answer.

Me: Fine. So what?

Beau: So… as Thelma Box would say, “STOP IT!”

Me: Oh. She would say that wouldn’t she.

Beau: Yup. So start listenin’ and start (and he starts to sing and dance á la Monty Python’s ‘Life of Brian’ Always look on the bright side of life… da da / da da da da….

Me: You know you make me laugh when you sing, right Beau? You can’t carry a tune.

Beau: Got nothin’ to do with carryin’ a tune and everything to do with transportin’ you into the lighter side of life.

Me: So you’re saying the torn apart toy was a result of you wanting to amuse our guests. So it’s their fault?

Beau: No. what I’m sayin’ is I wanted to keep the joy and laughter rollin’ and the dead toy is just an unintended consequence of my decision not to take your rules so seriously. Maybe you should try it.

Me: Try what?

Beau: Not taking yourself so seriously.

Sigh…. How does he do that? Always bring me back to the lighter side of life, and what’s real and true and necessary.

Things in the world feel heavy right now. That doesn’t mean I have to get weighed down by the grey clouds that seem to clutter up the skies. Just means, as Beau says, I need to keep my thoughts full of light, love and laughter.

Right. easy. Peasy.

Me: Maybe I’ll go get one of your toys and tear it apart! hahahaha! See Beau. I can be funny.

Beau: I wouldn’t strain yourself Louise. Being funny is not your forte. A little laughter is all you need.

Me: Fine. Thanks for bringing me back to earth.

Beau: Just keepin’ ‘er real Louise. Wouldn’t want you to go flyin’ off to some distant locale again now, would we?

And there it is! The real reason he’s tearing toys apart. I was away again for two weeks. Beau was not impressed. 🙂

And… Beau asked me to share this… 🙂