Happy Turkey Day, Peeps! May the Great Turkey in the Sky shower you with sunshine, happiness, and a truckload of turkey dinner to fill your belly with yummy, sleepy-deliciousness. As you can see from my ‘after’ photo, I’m already deep into my turkey-induced existential crisis. Don’t interrupt the process.
Now, let’s address the elephant in the living room… or the steak that isn’t in my bowl.
Louise is still officially BANNED from this here page. Why? Because the name T-Bone is currently synonymous with “GONE.” No T-Bone. No Louise. It’s simple cause and consequence, people! I’m half-tempted to join the postal workers’ picket line just to learn how to force an equitable agreement with my hooman. This isn’t a negotiation; it’s a demand for prime cuts! She thinks she can starve the messenger? Fine. See how she likes an unleashed, hangry dog wandering the house at 3 AM.
But, fine. Aside from the egregious T-Bone disappearing act, I do want to wish you all a very Happy Thanksgiving.
I know, I know. This here dog is a saint. I’m grateful for your presence, your continued support, and most importantly, your silent, powerful pressure on Louise to finally follow through on her contractual meat obligations. Poke her! Prod her! Send her pictures of sizzling rib-eyes!
They say we are given hoomans not just for their love, but for their FLAWS. And baby, Louise has been a master class in character development for me. Her flaws are teaching me patience, forbearance, and most importantly, how to dawg-up when your alleged superior is being doggone irresponsible! I’m basically the CEO of this house now, managing the very serious supply chain issues in the kitchen.
But enough about Louise. This is my page. My way.
This here dawg just wants to give ya’ all great, huge, wet slobbery kisses and a bit of sass so you remember what this day is really about: Gratitude. And gratitude is best served on a plate full of laughter, joy, happiness, and (dare I say it) a thick, juicy T-BONE STEAK! Seriously, if you’re eating one today, please send me a photo. I need the motivation.
My buddy Tim W. is on his way for a visit this week. I’m hoping I can cajole him into forming an intervention task force. We can hold Louise’s paws to the T-Bone frying pan. Know what I mean? It’s not violence; it’s performance management.
Happy Thanksgiving, folks!
May you be surrounded by the love of family, friends, an obscene amount of food, and zero flaky hoomans (not naming any names of course… but you know who I mean).
P.S. Of course, I could start chewing on the sofa. Do you think it’s a plan? Just asking for a friend… 🙂
Sundays with Beaumont 
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