Me:  Beaumont.... Beau:  Sorry. I can't hear you. Me:  Yes you can. Beau:  What do you want? Me:  Stop staring at your dad's toast. Beau:  Well he's eating it right in front of me. Me:  And you're not supposed to be on the bed. Beau:  Oh my. You do like to quibble over the small details don't you. What about the big picture?... Continue Reading →

Beaumont:  So.  The little guy's replaced me again. Me:    Beau.  He hasn't replaced you. We're just away visiting for his birthday. Beaumont:  And you didn't think to take me? Me:  Now that you mention it. No we didn't. Beaumont:  I rest my case. The little guy's replaced me again. Me:  (Sigh.)  There's no changing your mind is there? Beaumont:  You... Continue Reading →

Me:   Beaumont. We have to go. Beau:  I'm not ready. Me:  It's freezing out here. It's time to go. Beau:  How can you be cold? You're dressed up like you're ready for the North Pole. Me:  It feels like the North Pole out here. Beau:  Well. If you're dressed for it why do we have to go? Me:  Because 'baby, it's... Continue Reading →

Me:  Beaumont. We have to go for a walk. Beau:  Have you seen the weather out there? Me:  Doesn't matter. We still have to go. Beau:  I'm comfy. Me:  And I'm ready to go for a walk. Beau:  Have a nice time. Me. With you. Beau:  Do I look like I'm ready to go outside?... Continue Reading →

Me: Beaumont, you know I can see you there. Beaumont:  If you hadn't put in a glass stairwell you wouldn't. Me:  Quit stalling. I have to brush you. Beau:  Why? Me:  Because you'll get matted if I don't. Beau:  Then take me to my hairdressers. Cindy is much more gentle than you. Me:  You were just there three weeks ago. Beau:  So?... Continue Reading →

Beaumont:   Whaaaat? Me:  Beau, you know you're not supposed to beg for food. Beau:  I wasn't begging. Auntie Annie offered. Me:  And you know better than to accept. Beau:  Says who? Me:  (sigh)  Me? Beau:  Right. Anyone else? Me:  Beau. Be polite. Beau:  I am being polite. She's a guest. I'm just being polite in accepting what she offers. You want me... Continue Reading →

Beaumont:  Seriously?  How long do I have to lay here? Me:   Beau.  Tamara's just giving you a hug. Be nice. Beau:   I'd rather she gave me a treat. Me:  She just did. Beau:  Yeah. But she didn't say it came with a hug. Me:  I thought you liked hugs? Beau:  I do. But I like to protect my image more. Me:  And...... Continue Reading →

Beaumont:  Look. Seeing as you forgot my ball and ball chucker, why don't you just take one of those pretty red ones off the tree? Me:  They're Christmas decorations. Not balls. Beau:  So you say. They look perfectly round and throwable to me. Me:  They'd break the minute they touched the ground. Beau:  Prove it. Me:  I am not going to... Continue Reading →

Beau:  So.... is there a reason I am being lugged around like a toy poodle? Me:   Well, you are half poodle. Beau:  Standard poodle. There's a big difference between a toy and a standard you know. Me:   Well, you're as cute as a toy poodle. Beau:   Cute has nothing to do with my looks. I'm handsome. Debonair.... Continue Reading →

Beaumont:  Seriously. Just because you're in Mexico and haven't got a new photo of me, you're posting this ridiculous one? Me:  I don't want you to think we've forgotten about you. Beau:  You don't call. You don't text. you don't Facetime me? Me:  Hey!  We face timed you last week. You wouldn't look at us. Beau:  I... Continue Reading →